Raw & Empowered!

This is my abortion story. This was my 1st abortion. Today is the day after my abortion.

Years ago, I was told I have endometriosis. I didn't think I could get pregnant - my husband and I have been having unprotected sex for over a decade. Knowing I have endometriosis, medical issues and lots of scar tissue I did not see the pregnancy getting to full term or being healthy for myself or the baby.

My husband and I decided an abortion was the best option for my health, the baby’s health, our financial situation, and our 15 year old (the age gap wasn't ideal).

I finally got the courage to call the only abortion clinic at a reasonable distance (2 hours away). I told them everything and made an appointment for the next day.

I kept going over ALL the possible things that could go wrong in my head. I just broke down. I thought: “am I doing the right thing?” - yes, I know I am- but I'm scared shitless!

I finally stopped crying as we approached the clinic. On the phone they said to be aware of protesters and to ignore them. Luckily the rain made them chicken out.

We waited for a while. My name was called for my ultrasound. My husband was not permitted to go with me. She asked if I wanted to know how far along I was and if I wanted an ultrasound picture. I say yes to all. I was 5 weeks and 6 days pregnant.

After a while, I was called back to talk to a counselor. Turned out I couldn’t take the abortion pill because of some of the medications I take. I HAD to have the procedure. I FREAKED OUT!

I ended up scheduling my procedure for the very next day so I would not wreck myself with anxiety. So glad I was strong enough to not put it off!

The next day, when I saw the clinic, the nerves took over. I was told to go to the Relaxation Room, remove underwear and pants, put them in a provided bag, wrap a sheet around my bottom half and have a seat. I was the last patient of the day. A nurse came in and called my name. This is go time! No backing out. I was in a panicked dream state. The Dr came in and did a pelvic exam and used a vaginal ultrasound to see where exactly my uterus and the fetus are. The vaginal ultrasound did not hurt! Then came the real deal: she put some liquid on me for cleanliness purposes, put the forceps in and then she gave me shots in my cervix- ouch! It stung each time. Then she told the nurse to hand her other instruments. It was very uncomfortable, bad cramps! She used the suction device. It hurt. She did another vaginal ultrasound to see whether it was all out. I hear "all clear, got it all" and told me the pain was more intense because I had a C-section and lots of scar tissue. The procedure didn't last long but was intense!

I was escorted by the nurse to recovery. I was surprised I wasn’t in a lot of pain. I was released and could go home!

Today is the day after my abortion, no pain. I had my abortion when I was exactly 6 weeks pregnant. I kept thinking to myself how some women do not have this choice and how lucky I was. Even though it's not an ideal situation, it was safer than continuing the pregnancy.

I'm thankful I got to have this abortion and my heart goes out to those who live in a state where it's prohibited!

LOVE and PEACE to ALL!
If *I* can do this YOU can do this!